If You Are Praying About Getting Married

Last Sunday after church my wife and I had lunch with some single women from our church.

The conversation turned to marriage.

One of the women mentioned she had received a word from another Christian that she would marry a particular person.

This was a cause of some distress because she was not even remotely attracted to that person.

I told her that God might tell her not to marry someone she wanted to marry, but He would not tell her to marry someone she did not want to marry.

Now, I don’t have a scripture for that. In fact, the Lord told Hosea to marry a prostitute and Im guessing Hosea had different thoughts on the subject. (Hosea 1:1-3).  But unless you have been called as a prophet to Israel, I think my advice is sound.

I think it’s safe to assume if the Lord has called two people to spend the rest of their lives together in the most intimate of relationships there will be some natural attraction. If there isn’t, I think you can safely ignore “words” from others or impressions you get in prayer as premature or just plain wrong.

Where the Holy Spirit is more likely to speak to you is as a check against your natural desire to marry someone you should not. This is where most people miss it. They want to get married. People around them tell them what they don’t want to hear: it is not a good idea, they are too young, or the other person is not right for them. Often, this is the voice of the Lord, and too often it is ignored to the peril of both parties.

If you are wanting to get married, by all means pray. I’ve even suggested some thoughts on how to take up that task. But if you feel the Lord or someone else is telling you to marry someone you have no attraction for, you should start with the presumption that it is not the Lord. If you want to marry a particular person and you are praying for the Lord’s will, listen carefully, particularly to your family and Christian friends. GS


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